And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize
