everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize