I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
The convent might be a nice break from real life
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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