so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
