The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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