I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
