Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
