I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
