remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
