you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
