that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
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