last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So squirting runs in the family.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
