she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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