Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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