i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
