I think i sorta joined a cult last night
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize