Where did you get a picture of my penis
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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