Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
