I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
