i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize