Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize