Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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