question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
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