we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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