and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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