ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me + whiskey = a bad person
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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