WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
