My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall