With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
