I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize