Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
