So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
id be glad to
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
