butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
