she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
