Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
