martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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