My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
