I hate all girls vehemently.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
