come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
