im drinking this country out of the recession.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
