yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having hate sex.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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