your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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