Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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