hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
