I can tuck mytits in my pants
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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