did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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