i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
