Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
No subtext here. People are naked.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
