Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
My breasts were aching with rage.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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