You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
